Discover Which is Your Inner Deity

The Three Graces by Canova
Antonio Canova: The Three Graces

Every woman has deities inside her. Inner deities can change our lives if we learn to recognize them, listen to them and follow them, avoiding the conflicts and titanic wars they can create in our inner being. Inner deities are archetypes.

Do you know what archetypes are?

Archetypes are behavioural models belonging to the collective unconscious, not simple symbols but the essence that gives them life, allowing them to exist in time.

They are present in myths, fairy tales, legends all over the world and they often come to visit us in dreams to help us build an individual consciousness; they hide great energy and manifest themselves everywhere.

Carl Gustav Jung described them as follows: “No archetype is reducible to simple formulas. The archetype is like a vase that can never be emptied or filled. In itself, it exists only in power, and when it takes shape in a given material, it is no longer the same as before. It persists through the millennia and yet always requires new interpretations. Archetypes are unshakable elements of the unconscious, but they change form continuously”.

According to Jung and Jean S. Bolen, there are archetypal models linked to the deities of ancient Greece, both male and female, which symbolize the energy and instinct that each of us has.

For women, there are seven deities, these goddesses are not mutually exclusive, and they should never compete with each other. Some of these divinities are more manifest than others, depending on existential periods and personal characteristics, and all of them have precious gifts and teachings to give us.

Usually, there is one primary archetype, and then the others that coexist together, but sometimes the primary archetype can be repressed, for example, by specific education, or by social rules, which induce the woman to suffocate her true nature.

For this reason, it is essential to be aware of one’s inner deities and to know their characteristics, to integrate those we need or to free those repressed.

When we feel tormented and agitated, there is a conflicting situation between the deities and this creates imbalance; once we learn to recognize the inner goddesses, then we can listen to them and understand how they influence us.

Which One is Your Inner Deity?

Karl Lagerfeld: Chanel Cruise 2018
Karl Lagerfeld: Chanel Cruise 2018

Artemis

Goddess of hunting, of wildlife, symbolizes the need for independence and freedom. The Artemis-woman is autonomous, able to take care of herself, courageous, competitive, able to achieve her goals with determination. She is contemptuous, in some cases, of vulnerability, hostile to those who get in her way when she wants to reach a goal. Artemis’ weak point is the unconscious, towards which the woman with this archetype is not very receptive.

Athena

The goddess of wisdom and crafts, the Athena-woman is intellectual. She is determined, able to maintain control even in the most critical situations, objective and ambitious, hyper-organized—weak point: Athena risks neglecting the heart part of herself as well as the body. A repressed Athena-woman instead tends to disguise herself behind a cynical and insensitive appearance. In love, she prefers relationships of complicity and solidarity rather than passionate involvement. She is a tireless worker and must learn to integrate the childish part, a little suffocated in her, that is the innocence that distinguishes children and their ability to be moved without fear.

Hestia

The goddess of the hearth, she symbolizes the sacred fire that heats every home. She is a pure archetype, deeply spiritual, complete in itself, capable of inner concentration and very intuitive. The Hestia-woman loves to be alone, dedicating herself in various ways to her house, keeping it clean; in fact, through housework, she keeps her inner life in order. She is not an ambitious woman; she is not projected outside; she prefers her interiority—a weak point: loneliness, isolation, the tendency not to feel comfortable in unfamiliar environments. From a sentimental point of view, she is not very passionate and, although she is a woman of the house, she knows how to feel very well even alone, without a man. The Hestia-woman must learn to integrate her male side, which can help her to act in certain situations. She also needs to learn how to express herself with the outside world.

Hera

She is the goddess of marriage, married to Zeus, who was unfaithful to her. That is why Hera was venting her anger against her husband’s lovers. The Hera-woman needs a companion in life and would do anything to keep him to herself. She is attracted to powerful men or men in need of warmth. She is not very interested in work; she feels complete through marriage and is not even tied to friendships. She is rather angry if abandoned or hurt and tends to be the victim. In her destructive side, the Hera-woman is hostile towards other women and is willing to do anything to continue her marriage; she is judgmental and vindictive as well as jealous. She needs to learn to be more independent of her husband and to channel her anger and jealousy.

Demeter

Goddess of harvest, she symbolizes the maternal instinct that can manifest itself not only with children but also with an attitude of welcome, generosity towards others; the woman Demeter loves to host many people, friends and family at home. Weak point: feeling empty when children leave home, in general, she is very protective, generous, altruistic. She loves immature men, in need of protection, she loves cuddling rather than real sexual intercourse. In her work, she is neither competitive nor ambitious and is often involved in professions related to teaching or caring for the sick. At times, she may experience depression and victimization, ending up as a victim of the Red Cross Nurse Syndrome (which is the tendency to fix everything and take care of others despite themselves). She needs to learn to express anger, to say no, and to let go.

Persephone

The Queen of the Underworld is a goddess with a dual identity. She is both Persephone and Kore. The Persephone part is mature and self-confident, she reigns over the dead guiding the living into the underworld, that is, she knows how to move between the ego and the unconscious. The Kore part is that of the immature young girl who does not know who she is and what her potential is; she tends to be passive. From the sentimental point of view, she waits for Prince Charming and assumes a childish behaviour. She tends to frequently change her job, with a playful and irresponsible attitude towards life. If the Kore part activates the Persephone part, then she matures, but this usually happens when she is forced to face life with her strength, without support. Weak point: she can become too narcissistic, depressed, anxious to please others.

Aphrodite

Goddess of love and beauty, she symbolizes the power of transformation and creation. The Aphrodite-woman is attractive and sensual, magnetic, extrovert, lives in the present, is very connected to the senses. She naturally attracts men, but, if repressed, she tends to feel guilty. She is very seductive, and it is difficult for her to remain faithful to a single companion, she does not like repetitive jobs, she prefers creative professions. She is elegant by nature and therefore not much loved by other women. If she falls in love with men who do not want her enough, she tends to become obsessed with the bond. She must learn to be more emotionally detached from relationships so as not to risk being sucked into them.

My Favorite Archetype: The Wise Woman (or Great Mother)

woman and candles, Photo by cottonbro
Photo by Cottonbro

There is another archetype, very powerful: the Wise Woman. In the collective imagination, wise women resemble a little bit like witches, and I believe that this is so, because after all these women are often nonconformist; they live according to their aspirations and mock the dictates of patriarchal society. They help people to discover their uniqueness and spirituality.

Who are the wise women? They are women who have walked an often tortuous path, made up of lessons and profoundly transformative experiences, which have taken them on the road to inner maturity.

Wisdom means awareness and is not measured in years of life. There are wise women, even 25 years old! They are the ones who, when they were little girls, suffered tough blows but found within them the strength to get up and felt in their hearts the urge to help others.

We have many examples of Wise Women, even in our recent history. My thoughts immediately fly to Maya Angelou, Frida Kahlo, Mary Wollstonecraft, but also to Meryl Streep, Oprah Winfrey, to name a few. If you think of a female character you like, you could trace her back to this archetype, or to one of the goddesses I described earlier, and you will be surprised to find exactly these characteristics.

According to Jean S. Bolen, an internationally renowned psychologist and author, wise women are part of the Great Mother archetype. We think of a strong female figure, for example, a grandmother who behaves maternally with all children and wants the best for all of them, not only for her children or grandchildren.

The 13 Rules of Wise Women

According to Jean S. Bolen, thirteen rules identify the Wise Women:

1. Wise women do not live to complain; they create change.

2. Wise women are brave.

3. Wise women have green thumb with plants.

4. Wise women trust their intuition and respect that of others.

5. Wise women meditate every day and are in communication with their inner selves.

6. Wise women firmly defend what they consider essential.

7. Wise women also choose their path with their hearts.

8. Wise women speak the truth with compassion.

9. Wise women listen to their bodies.

10. Wise women extemporize and play.

11. Wise women do not beg.

12. Wise women laugh together.

13. Wise women appreciate the positive in life and share it with simplicity.

Have you already identified your archetype? It certainly takes a little bit of inner analysis and a lot of listening to ourself, we need to connect with our spirituality and become aware of the existence of these elements in us.

Many confuse spirituality with religion, but they are two different things.

Spirituality is our most important dimension, and many times (too many) underestimated.

Spirituality means to love oneself and the others, to focus on one’s breath, on the deep silence within, and to find the source of our light. It means getting lost in a forest or admiring a sunrise. Cherish the sea or a flower garden. It means nourishing the soul with beauty and poetry.

Every time we get away from our spirituality, we feel lost, and our body advises us, sending signals such as anxiety, panic, pain, sadness, depression. They are deceptions of the mind to bring us back to the point where we are lost.

Cultivating spirituality means not allowing external events to obscure our light, to lose the joy to live. For this reason, we must always act with love and kindness and nourish our souls so that we can benefit others, giving them positivity, energy, inspiration, motivation.

Precisely in this journey to the (re)discovery of my spirituality, I learned to listen to my inner deity and began to make my true nature re-emerge. I changed everything: lifestyle, work, negative people and I started to build a better version of myself. I reinvented myself, and I am immensely satisfied with my choice.

If you are also interested in walking the path of transformation,  you can follow this Free Training that will show you a different, more sustainable, more authentic way to live your life. Register Here.

“That a woman who continues to enrich her wisdom must constantly find new roots in the spiritual life is an extreme act of liberation. Teaching young people to do the same – and by “young people,” I mean anyone with less awareness or less experience – is the greatest radical and revolutionary act.”(Clarissa Pinkola Estés)

BIBLIOGRAPHY
Goddesses in Everywoman by Jean Shinoda Bolen

How to Close Vicious Cycles: The Three Phases Rule

woman on a swing, Photo by Artem Beliaikin
Photo by Artem Beliaikin

How many times do we fall into the same traps, and each time we promise not to fall again? For example, all those times we say “I always choose the wrong boyfriend!”, or in the office “I always make this mistake with colleagues, or the boss”, or “The discussion with my husband always ends the same way”.

It is as if we deliberately choose to hurt ourselves, knowing full well how it will end. And yet, it is more potent than us: we are trapped in a mental loop that always pushes us in the same direction.

Why does our mind continue to act in the same way? Sometimes we look like little mice on a wheel, who can’t see that the cage is open and freedom is at hand. Why don’t we get out? Because a part of us is terrified of change.

Why Do We Struggle To Close Cycles?

Closing cycles means renouncing, going your own way without looking back, and it also means letting go of what you know, and that somehow gives us a sense of security.

Renouncing means choosing between a painful past and an uncertain future, but in this equation, a crucial time is missing: the present. The only time in which we can take action. It is the key to change: if this moment is missing, nothing will change in our life.

That’s why we struggle to close the cycles: we are not used to living in the present. We are projected continuously into tomorrow or turned to our past.

The Rule of Three Phases For Living In The Present

clocks, Photo by Giallo
Photo by Giallo

Some of these cycles are dangerous for us, poisonous because they prevent us from being happy and fulfilled. We must close them to live. For every cycle we manage to close, we retrieve a fragment of ourselves because closing cycles requires knowing how to look inside ourselves with honesty. It means becoming a little more aware of our strengths and weaknesses, it means looking inside ourselves, deeply, to grow; and it means taking off the masks we have built up over the years.

In this process, we must be present: it means being focused on what we are living and who we are; acting in the here and now, connecting mind-heart-soul.

It isn’t effortless, but if we want to close a cycle that is slowly annihilating us, we have to go through three phases.

Phase 1. The grief

The present turned to the past: we are at the end of a cycle, but we have not yet closed it, for several reasons maybe because we feel nostalgic and think back to all the happy moments of the past and find more reasons to repeat it than to close it.

At this point, we must stop and examine this past well. What conditions has this past produced? Let’s stay in the present and look at the results. How many are positive? How many negatives? Are we being stuck? Are these results denying us evolution and growth? We need to go through all stages of awareness: from pain to sadness and finally to acceptance. Then, we will be ready for the next step.

Phase 2. The waiting

The absolute present: we are ready to close that chapter of our life, but, at this point, we need to dig even deeper into ourselves.

Waiting does not mean “doing nothing” or being passive. On the contrary, waiting is a moment of great inner activity: this is where you have to dig deep to analyze every thought, emotion and reaction to find the problem. This problem is a wound that has caused pain or discomfort, and that pushes us always to do the same actions and always to have the same behavior.

Phase 3. The rebirth

The present turned to the future: it is the first action we take in the direction we have chosen to follow, and that is in harmony with who we are. It is the first small step taken with the awareness of who we are and where we are.

Rebirth is the first manifestation of a new form of life, of a transformation. From this moment we will be able to walk the rest of the journey following our times, with confidence and facing (and overcoming) old and new fears from time to time.

How to Face Fear?

Fear is our prison, and we created it ourselves! Like the little mouse on the wheel who can’t see that the cage is open. We are all able to understand our fears and then face them; it only takes a little bit of courage to take the first step.

Here are four tips to get you started:

  • Let’s welcome our fear: first of all, we must admit we are afraid and experience it all, even if it is unpleasant.
  • We find the courage to dig inside ourselves and understand why we are afraid: what is the source? It is undoubtedly a wound, caused by what (or by who)? Is it a fear dictated by real danger, or is it just our mental creation?
  • If we have accepted our fear, and if we have dared to understand its cause, then we are strong. It means that we have great inner strength. So, let us use this strength: the more we release our inner self, the freer we are to be at peace.
  •  All we have to do is train. Let’s face the small fears first and then the bigger ones. The small successes will serve us as motivation to face more significant fears and to walk the path of this change. It is continuous training, but it helps to make us determined and therefore confident and happy.

Recognizing and facing fears is the only way to achieve a positive inner transformation and therefore a personal growth, which will lead us to happiness and also to full realization, not only in private but also in professional life.

According to Dr Wayne Dyer, 96% of our actions are dictated by our subconscious mind. It’s like living on autopilot. We, through the various phases and difficulties of life, have created that behavioural model, and only we can reprogram it. And welcome the change.

If that model is cynical and perverse, we have the responsibility to change it, to live this life to the fullest. And do not waste it, spinning in fear (for no reason) on the wheel like the mouse.

I want to share with you this poem, which I consider outstanding.

He who dies (Ode to life – Ode alla vita)
By Martha Medeiros
Slowly dies he who becomes a slave to habit,
repeating the same journey every day,
he who doesn’t change his march, he who doesn’t risk
and change the color of his clothes, he who doesn’t speak to he whom he doesn’t know.
Slowly dies he who makes of the television his guru,
Slowly he who avoids a passion dies, he who prefers
black on white and dots onis rather than a togetherness of emotions
exactly those that make the eyes shine,
those that make the heart beat
before error and feeling.
Slowly dies he who doesn’t overturn the table,
he who is unhappy in his work,
he who doesn’t risk certainty for uncertainty
to follow a dream,
he who doesn’t permit himself at least one time in his life
to flee sensible counsels.
Slowly dies he who doesn’t travel, he who doesn’t read,
he who doesn’t listen to music,
he who doesn’t find grace in himself.
Slowly he who destroys his own love dies,
he who doesn’t allow himself to be helped.
Slowly he who passes his days lamenting
about his own misfortune or the incessant rain dies.
Slowly dies he who abandons a project
before beginning it,
he who doesn’t ask questions about topics he doesn’t know,
he who doesn’t answer when he is asked something that he knows.
Let’s avoid death by small doses,
remembering always that being alive
requires a much larger effort
than the simple act of breathing.
Only burning patience will bring
within reach a splendid happiness.

Do not give up life; do not die slowly. Identify the cause of your suffering and work to change your life. Please do it for yourself, and do it for your children, your family, and eventually for this planet.

I find myself in this space, on this path, because I dug inside myself and I understood what was creating my suffering because it did not allow me to manage my time freely: my job as a project manager. Always a slave to the schedules and needs of clients, colleagues or employers. I had money and a career, but I was not happy because I was renouncing to my time, to my children growing up so fast, to my family so easy to lose. I was sacrificing my life.

It is survival, not living. Does it make sense?

I undertook a (difficult) path of inner transformation, and today I am free from the schemes, and I found a way to reinvent myself. I can finally say that I have the luxury of working as I decide and enjoying my time as I wish.

I can help you if you want to take the same path and if you want to reinvent yourself. You have to be willing to learn and invest in yourself, and you have to be ready to feel uncomfortable because you will emerge from the proverbial comfort zone, and because you will face your fears. All this to return to living an authentic life, sustainably.

If you want to do it, and if you want to see real results, start following this Free Video Series, they will explain in detail how to proceed and what to do to take the first step. Or, contact me, and I will be happy to take you by the hand and accompany you on your way to rebirth. You can do it.

𝗗𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗯𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗿𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝗯𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝘆𝗼𝗻𝗲, 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝘀𝗼𝘂𝗹 𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗮𝗹 𝘁𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂. — 𝗙𝗿𝗶𝗱𝗮 𝗞𝗮𝗵𝗹𝗼